Isn't Facebook the best and worst thing to ever be invented? I mean, best of course because you get to "reconnect" with people you may or may not have been close friends with at some point in your life. And worst because it can be extremely time consuming and addictive. There is a FB group that has been created for the PA Class of 2014 at Husbands school. I have become a "member" so that I can give insight to some of the questions that come up...of course, from a wife's perspective. It amazes me how many of the exact same questions have come up that Husband and I had in those months and weeks leading up to the start of his first fall semester.
"What equipment do we need?"
"What can we start studying?"
"Do you have class at night?"
"How much time do you spend studying?"
...and my favorite..."Do you get weekends off?"...that one always makes me laugh.
Reading these questions and seeing people talk about when they are moving to the area and getting settled takes me back to that summer before Husband started and remembering some pretty crippling insecurities that would creep into my mind and take over.
Just a little background, my degree is in marketing and the LAST thing that I am interested in is science and medicine. So when it comes to Husband being able to come home and have those conversations with me, it just really doesn't happen. Not that I'm not smart enough to sort of follow along, but really, the icky stuff and the tiny little parts of the body doesn't do it for me. Now, get me talking about advertising or sales...I'm ALL over it!
One of the biggest fears I had about Husband being around his "peeps" was that he would begin to think I was not as interesting as he once had. And I won't lie. In the first few social events we went to, I quickly realized that my stereotypical view of "science girls" was COMPLETELY wrong. These girls were beautiful, funny, athletic, and had great personalities. OH crap. These are the women Husband is going to be in groups with, studying with, and honestly going to be spending more time with than me. How am I going to measure up to that?
The solution: I don't measure up. But, it's because there is no comparison. I did confess these insecurities finally to Husband one night after a big fight that I'm sure I started over something completely stupid. And when it came out, it wasn't pretty (100% sure snot was involved). I'm sure I looked like a complete idiot to him, but he did the BEST thing any Husband can do. He laughed at me. Not like a "you're so dumb" laugh, but a "I love you so much that you love me so much that you're worried about this" laugh. He assured me that he fell in love with me and married ME because of who I am and who we are as a couple and now as a family. He had been around other "science" girls before, but he loved me even though that is not my passion. It really was a great night.
Another thing we have always agreed on, was that he would be completely open about our marriage and family with his classmates. I think this is a HUGE reason why I feel so comfortable with his friends. I sort of feel like I know them, and they know me, because Husband makes it a point to talk about me and Little Man. He has told me before that he never wants anyone to question his devotion to us. I know in a class of 70 where there are only about 20 men, that he will be in groups with women. But to be honest, now, I don't even think twice. I love that he has total freedom to study with whom he finds the most success, without worrying that it will cause friction at home. Just food for thought.
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